What Are You Willing to Trade for an Education?
So much of the time as homeschoolers we have to deal with the opinions of others who think that by not sending our children to school, we are taking something away from them; we are limiting them; they are missing out.
What if we turned this question around? I know schooling is often marketed as this amazing gift to children, but what if we took a second to consider all the things that children may have to give up for this opportunity? Maybe then it would be easy to see all the benefits of homeschooling.
As homeschoolers, we are not taking something away from our children, in fact, many of us choose to homeschool because there are things that we don’t want to give up.
Let’s imagine for a minute instead of having to defend ourselves we could ask our own question…
What Are You Willing to Trade for an Education?
Time? Are you willing to give up 15,000+ hours of childhood? Of time with your child? Of time they could be pursuing their own interests?
Connection? That time undoubtedly has an impact. By the time these children are teenagers, adults are complaining about how combative their relationship with their teen has become. Are you willing to have your connection with your child impacted in the name of ‘education’?
Parenting values? If you are a conscious/respectful/gentle/unconditional type parent, are you ok with putting your child into an environment for 6+ hours a day, 5 days a week, that is opposite to your beliefs? Where they will use punishment and rewards to control your child? Where extrinsic motivation will be favoured over intrinsic? Where their rights are not respected?
Carefree outlook? Your child may be pretty carefree before school. There are no timelines, no forced learning, no judgement. Will you exchange that for pressure and outcomes and standardisation?
Love of learning? Your child loves to learn! Will they still love to learn when it is not self-chosen learning, but forced from a young age? Are you ok with them no longer loving to learn, as long as they are ‘educated’?
Individual interests? Will you exchange ample time for following their own interests, for learning what they are told when they are told? Is it ok with you that even their free time may be taken up with homework?
Autonomy? Is it ok to give up your autonomy for an ‘education’? To no longer have the right to eat when hungry, go to the toilet when you need to, wear whatever clothing you want to wear, choose how you spend your time, not be able to move your body when you need to?
Freedom? Should a child be expected to give up their freedom for schooling?
Mental health? Significant numbers of children at school report being stressed, anxious, and depressed. Many children are bullied every day by other students, or even teachers. Should we risk our children’s mental health for this type of ‘socialization’?
Confidence? Being judged, compared, and tested is not good for anyone’s self-esteem. Would you give up some of their confidence for school?
Real world experiences? Yes, you can still have real-world experiences outside of the time you’re in school, but there is no doubt you can have more if 5 days a week aren’t taken up by schooling. You can learn things that are important for real life by living real life. Or you can give up those opportunities for a classroom.
Creativity? Creativity thrives in freedom and spontaneity, not a controlled environment. Children are so creative until it gets educated out of them. The world needs more people surviving into adulthood with their creativity intact.
Authentic friendships? If you’ve seen what friendships between children who have not been to school are like, you know what I’m talking about. Outside of school children are free to have much more authentic friendships where they are able to be themselves without fear of being shamed or rejected. They support each other’s uniqueness.
I feel like I could go on for a very long time. When you step foot inside a school, you must give up so much, even parts of yourself.
As homeschoolers, we have considered the options; probably more than most. No need to fear, we know exactly what we’re giving up. Do you?
What are you willing to trade for an education?
Comments
Powerful post and point to make to those that do choose to send their kids to school! Love your articles!
Years ago, I was riding a bus in Hawaii with the then, six year old. A fellow passenger demanded t know why he wasn’t in school. I replied, “Well, if he was locked in a building all day, then he couldn’t be here enjoying and learning about everything aroudn us could he?”
“What do you mean ‘locked in a building’,” she replied indignantly confused.
“Ma’am, the kids walk into the school at eight, they lock the doors, and they’re not released till 3 in the afternoon, what would you call it?”
Confusion, realization, and only a tad of remaining indignation swept across her face.At wich point, thankfully, we hit her bus stop and off she went.
Meanwhile, the kid and I had been camping on Oauhu for the last three days. He’d taught himself how to swim while I worked at a nearby picnic table, he’d learned about the Hawaii transit system, eaten breakfast at a place where we shared the tables with goats and chickens each morning, (just a bit up the #60 line), and toured the Dole Pineapple plantation. It was a win on so many levels 🙂
I tried to homeschool my daughter with Autism. She didn’t take to it at all. I was heartbroken. I support all homeschoolers. It’s a wonderful way to teach and spend time with your children.
My DD (15) just got back from a sailing expedition where she was the only Home Educated child. On the last day another boy her age decided he would take it upon himself to educate her in all the ways she was missing out by not going to school. It actually only totalled two things – the school prom and a trip abroad once a year. She smiled sweetly and said she’s been abroad 3 times already this year and that she goes out socially regularly and didn’t need a prom.
Hahaha love that!